Before approving any new app, check: who can contact your child, what data or location gets shared by default, whether there's an easy-to-use block/report system, what the algorithm optimizes for, and whether parental controls actually work as advertised. If an app fails two or more of these, it's worth a harder look before saying yes.
The short answer
Instead of memorizing which specific apps are "safe" -- a list that goes stale within months -- evaluate any app your child asks for against five consistent questions: who can contact them, what gets shared by default, how reporting and blocking work, what the algorithm is optimized for, and whether parental controls are genuinely functional.
The five questions
- Who can contact my child? Check whether default settings allow messages from strangers.
- What gets shared automatically? Location tagging and public-by-default profiles are common defaults worth checking first.
- How easy is it to block and report? Test it yourself -- if it's buried, your child won't use it when it matters.
- What is the algorithm optimized for? Engagement-driven feeds tend to surface more extreme content over time.
- Do parental controls actually work? Some are easily bypassed with a second account.
A framework beats a list
New platforms appear constantly, and any list of "approved apps" is outdated within a year. A consistent framework holds up far longer than memorizing today's landscape.
Our Digital Literacy and Safety Blueprint walks through this framework in full, plus scripts for the conversation when the answer is no.
Frequently asked questions
What age should kids get their first social media account?
There's no universal right age -- it depends on the platform, the child's maturity, and your family's comfort level.
Are parental control apps enough on their own?
Not usually -- most are easily bypassed by a motivated kid with a second account. They work best as one layer alongside ongoing conversation.
The Talk Before the Phone -- A digital literacy and safety guide for your child's first smartphone or social media account.